In the Fall of 2013 when I decided to write a book about boundaries for partners, I began with an outline that became Moving Beyond Betrayal, and decided to start a blog as a way to write the book.
The blog was originally named Survival Strategies for Partners of Sex Addicts, and the first article was published on February 16, 2014. The name of the blog was later changed to Survival Strategies for Betrayed Partners, and eventually to Thriving After Betrayal.
The changes to the blog’s name over the years reflect a progression in my thinking about how to support partners impacted by chronic betrayal. My vision for every partner is that she (or he) not only survive, but that she also thrive — which includes shedding labels like “partner of a sex addict” or “betrayed partner.”
Labels that define a partner by who she is in relationship with, or how she was wounded, may have the unintended consequence of keeping her tethered to an identity that does not serve her healing, growth, empowerment, and thriving.
Thriving after betrayal is only possible through learning how to turn your attention to yourself, and letting go of everything that is outside your circle of control.
Today my passion is focused on supporting all women to thrive no matter what has happened to them, who has hurt them, or whether or not their relationship survived betrayal.
In the last 6 years, the blog has covered nearly every topic impacting partners moving beyond betrayal. There are 184 articles containing approximately 145,000 words — the equivalent of three average length nonfiction books.
The top 10 most read posts are:
- 7 Key Components of “Therapeutic” Separation Agreement
- Formal Therapeutic Disclosure
- Non-Negotiable Boundaries
- 7 Signs You’re Being Gaslighted
- Is Your Partner Holding You Accountable, or Just Taking Your Inventory?
- Planning In-House Separation
- Release Resentment in 5 Steps
- A Guide to Betrayed Partner Impact Statements
- Emotional Restitution
- Requests, Demands & Ultimatums
It has been an honor and a privilege to have been given the time and resources necessary to create, grow, and maintain this resource. I am especially grateful to my husband of 33 years who has been instrumental in changing the lives of thousands of partners and spouses through his unwavering support of me and my work.
I feel complete with this offering to the community of partners moving beyond betrayal, their spouses, the coaches and therapists who work with them, and anyone who has benefitted from these words and resources in the past and in the years to come.
My intention is to preserve and keep this precious resource freely available to every partner and spouse who needs it. My wish is that the information you discover here informs, supports, heals, and inspires.
The next chapter of my blogging life has begun in my new project, The Radiant Threefold Path, and I would love for you to follow me there.
As always, I stand for your thriving.
© Vicki Tidwell Palmer (2020)