Let’s face it—feeling powerless bites. There’s hardly anything as infuriating as the realization that you’re up against a problem or situation of some kind where there is absolutely nothing you can do to change it. Powerlessness will make you believe that there is nothing you can do, or worse, that you’re a victim. And when you see yourself as… Continue Reading…
Can I (Partners + Addicts) Ask for THAT?
I just finished up the sixth Live Q&A Call with members of my Partner’s Healing & Empowerment Online Community Forum a couple of hours ago. One of the members submitted this question for me to answer on the call: “Is it okay to ask an addict to sell a car, furniture, or even a home if… Continue Reading…
How Long Should it Take to Prepare a Disclosure?
Last week, one of the members of my Survive & Thrive Membership Community for betrayed partners asked this question: How long should it take for a sex addict to prepare a disclosure to present to his partner? If you’re not familiar with the disclosure process, you can read my article about formal therapeutic disclosure (FTD) here. Briefly,… Continue Reading…
Did I “Fail” if My Relationship Ends?
If you’ve been in a relationship that didn’t work out — and most of us have — you may feel like you failed. It’s common for people who go through divorce to feel as though they failed, or that their relationship was a failure. What if your relationship with the sex addict didn’t —or doesn’t — work… Continue Reading…
When Your Therapist “Doesn’t Get It”
Over the years, I’ve heard a number of stories from betrayed partners—and their unfaithful spouses—about experiences of seeking help from counselors, clergy members, and therapists for relationship advice or concerns about addiction. Let me start by saying that my intention is not to criticize or trash other therapists. Most therapists have a specialization of some kind—even those who… Continue Reading…
My Partner Ignored My Request—What Should I Do?
Happy Labor Day to my US and Canadian Friends! I was recently asked this question by a partner in my international online community (Partner’s Healing & Empowerment Online Forum): I made a request of my (sex addict) partner, and he never gave me answer. In the meantime, the requests I made have become requirements for… Continue Reading…
What No One Should Say To Huma Abedin About Anthony Weiner (HuffPo Voices)
When I heard the news yesterday that Anthony Weiner was caught in yet another sexting scandal, my heart went out to his wife, Huma Abedin, and his whole family. It is painful enough to make a discovery as devastating as this one. But to endure the public revelation—and humiliation—that goes with it is truly heartbreaking. I… Continue Reading…