Wednesday night I had the privilege of attending a talk by Dan Rather about his most recent book, What Unites Us: Reflections on Patriotism. After a storied career spanning more than six decades, interviewing every president since Eisenhower, and anchoring the CBS Evening News for 24 years, it was encouraging to hear him say: If… Continue Reading…
Why Are You Still With HIM?
If your spouse has been chronically unfaithful, and you’ve disclosed it to family or friends, you’ve probably been asked this question. You likely had one of two internal responses: shame or shame + confusion. Shame because the question implies that there must be something wrong with YOU. The person posing the question may think that if… Continue Reading…
Latest Podcast Interview: Thanks for Sharing Episode #60
I was honored to be interviewed by Jackie Pack and Jonathan Taylor on their Thanks for Sharing Podcast last week. Jackie and Jon welcome Vicki Tidwell Palmer, author of Moving Beyond Betrayal: The 5-Step Boundary Solution for Partners of Sex Addicts. Vicki, Jon and Jackie explore the nature and role of boundaries in recovery and… Continue Reading…
Partners, Triggers & “Adult” Entertainment
Sexually oriented businesses are intensely triggering to betrayed partners. Seeing a massage parlor, adult bookstore, strip club, or so-called modeling studio can bring on a panic attack. Partners often intentionally avoid driving or walking by one of these business establishments to manage their anxiety. While it’s completely understandable and natural to be triggered when being… Continue Reading…
Protect Your Confidence—4 Ways
Sexual betrayal has a way of destroying—at least temporarily—a partner’s confidence. Confidence is defined as: The feeling or belief that one can rely on someone or something; firm trust. It’s interesting that confidence is related to trust. And in the case of self-confidence, that means you have the feeling or belief that you can rely… Continue Reading…
When an Affair Partner is a Co-Worker
Discovering that your spouse had an affair is painful enough. But finding out that the affair partner is a co-worker, supervisor, or employee can be doubly devastating. Imagine your spouse leaving each day to go to work, and the feelings of powerlessness—knowing that he will spend the majority of his day with a former affair… Continue Reading…
Negotiating Non-Negotiables [for Addicts] Part 2
[Read Negotiating Non-Negotiables for Addicts Part 1 here.] Of all the topics I cover on my blog, non-negotiable boundaries tends to push the most buttons—for betrayed partners and unfaithful spouses alike. Betrayed partners sometimes mis-use non-negotiables to gain a sense of safety or control. Or they use them as a way to avoid the painful… Continue Reading…