In the Fall of 2013 when I decided to write a book about boundaries for partners, I began with an outline that became Moving Beyond Betrayal, and decided to start a blog as a way to write the book. The blog was originally named Survival Strategies for Partners of Sex Addicts, and the first article… Continue Reading…
Life Can Only Be Found in the Present Moment
Over the past two weeks as most of us in the US have necessarily entered into various forms of shelter in place or stay at home conditions, life has become more simple, more immediate, and in many ways more intensely intimate. I’ve heard heart-warming stories from clients about closer connections with spouses and children, more… Continue Reading…
Healing Begins With You
I’ll get right to the point: emotional healing is an inside job. I know, because over the years I’ve experienced a multitude of emotional wounds — many self-inflicted, some having no obvious explanation, and some inflicted on me by another person’s unconsciousness or cruelty. Regardless of who or what was “at fault” for my pain,… Continue Reading…
An Open Letter to Betrayed Male Partners
First, I want to say “thank you” to all of you who have thanked me over the years for my work on behalf of betrayed partners. In the past year, I have become clearer about where I want to focus my efforts and who I want to serve, which is something I encourage every person… Continue Reading…
5 Ways to Deprive the Past of Oxygen
Discovering that you’ve been betrayed or deceived is devastating. Discovery is disorienting, and creates feelings of uncertainty about yourself, your spouse, and your life. To make sense of the new information you’ve received and to seek a sense of safety, some of the most common activities partners engage in immediately after discovery are: Searching phone… Continue Reading…
Refocus Your View With Gratitude: The #6 Skill for Building Intimacy
[This is the seventh, and final, article of a 7-part series on the Six Intimacy Skills™️ by Laura Doyle. Read the first article here.] The sixth of the Six Intimacy Skills™ is refocusing your view with gratitude. Gratitude is defined as: the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness…. Continue Reading…
Vulnerability: The #5 Skill for Building Intimacy
[This article is the sixth in a 7-part series on the Six Intimacy Skills™️ by Laura Doyle. Read the first article here.] The fifth of the Six Intimacy Skills™ is revealing your heart with vulnerability. Vulnerability is defined as: the quality or state of being exposed to the possibility of being attacked or harmed, either… Continue Reading…
Receiving Graciously: The #4 Skill for Building Intimacy
[This article is the fifth in a 7-part series on the Six Intimacy Skills™️ by Laura Doyle. Read the first article here.] Since we’re now in the full swing of the holiday season, it’s the perfect time to talk about receiving graciously! Why is receiving graciously an intimacy skill? Think back to a time when… Continue Reading…
Relinquish Inappropriate Control: The #3 Skill for Building Intimacy
[This article is the fourth in a 7-part series on the Six Intimacy Skills™️ by Laura Doyle. Read the first article here.] Relinquishing inappropriate control is the third of the Six Intimacy Skills (SIS), and is one of the most difficult of the SIS to practice. Relinquishing control requires the consistent ability to refrain from… Continue Reading…
Respect: The #2 Skill for Building Intimacy
[This article is the third in a 7-part series on the Six Intimacy Skills™️ by Laura Doyle. Read the first article here.] Before discussing why respect is an intimacy skill, it’s helpful to start with a definition. Here are two definitions of respect: a feeling of deep admiration for someone or something elicited by their… Continue Reading…
Self-Care: The #1 Skill for Building Intimacy
[This article is the second in a 7-part series on the Six Intimacy Skills™️ by Laura Doyle. Read the first article here.] Self-care is a fundamental life and relationship skill that every person must understand and practice. At its most basic level, self-care is about attending to your physical, intellectual, emotional, and spiritual needs, and… Continue Reading…
Six Intimacy Skills Every Woman Needs
[This article is the first in a 7-part series on the Six Intimacy Skills™️ by Laura Doyle.] I don’t know about you, but I did not learn the kind of healthy intimacy skills that sustain long-term relationships when I was growing up. Although I sincerely believe my parents were doing the very best they could,… Continue Reading…